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Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Well, I move tomorrow. Not looking forward to it, since it's a lot of work, and too much hassle, but hey, it's got to be done. So I won't be around for a while, since it will take godfucking SBC a while to get around to hooking my DSL up over there. This irks me for several reasons, but what can you do.

Anyway, I will blog more in detail after I am all settled in the new place.

Oh yeah, and I finally got a job. I start Monday at Tim Hortons. I get to wear a dumb uniform and pour coffee all day. Whee. But money is money, and I do need money. So there's a small relief.

Okay, so yeah. I'll blog more when I'm all settled in.

To tide you over, here's a new Lil' Zombie.

Take care, everyone. See you in a while.


link | posted by Zombie at 7:40 PM | 0 comments


Saturday, March 27, 2004

Zombie's Mad Paint Skillz

Per Skippy's suggestion, I have created a special dramatization of actual events regarding the mold epidemic in my home. Keep children and old people away from the screen while you view this, as it's a very harrowing experience to even see the picture. Bear in mind that I had to use my artistic license when creating this horrifying image. I don't actually live in a house, or in anything remotely resembling a house. Casa del Zombie is, in actuality, a sort of rat hole, deep in the ground, and vaguely box shaped.

Anyway, here you go:



I know. I know. I r0x0rz.


link | posted by Zombie at 5:19 PM | 0 comments


Tuesday, March 23, 2004

I'm So Damned Mad...

Okay, I don't know if you all remember a time back in October or so when my apartment flooded twice in less than a month?

Well, yeah.

If you don't, here's what happened:

We live in a sub-level apartment. The ground is level with the bottom of our windows. There is apparently a drain pan around the bottom of the building, underground, to siphon off rainwater and such to keep the building from flooding.

Well, the drain pain underneath our windows apparently got clogged, thus allowing all sorts of water to soak through the concrete and flood our living room. We had a standing puddle of water in here. Our couch was soaked. It was nasty.

We complained. They came 'round to look at it and asked me if I had left the windows open to cause this. Uhm, no. They said it would be cleaned up. We moved the couch away from the wall there, and a nice little mold farm was growing. Slimy, black mold.

They dug up the ground outside the window and 'fixed' it. Three days later, it rained and flooded again. When I went over to complain again, they said, 'Oh, we'll look into it.'

I heard nothing for a couple days, then looked out the window one morning to see someone planting a bush over top the spot where they dug. I opened the window and said, 'Excuse me. Why are you doing that? They're supposed to dig that up again.'

He said he was just doing what he was told.

I went back over to the office to ask what was going on. I was told it was normal for it to have flooded again, since the dirt needed to settle. I said that wasn't so good since my carpet was soaked again and so was my couch, and I wanted it fixed.

They came in and steam cleaned the apartment. The guy didn't do a good enough job, so they had someone else come in and steam clean it. The baseboard was rotten and moldy, so the maintenance man came in to fix it. He yanked it off the wall, and I could see all sorts of fun mold and nasty growing in there. I said, 'Aren't you going to clean that out?'

'No, it'll be fine.'

So instead of cleaning it, he just tacked a new baseboard on top of the spot where the old one was and called it done.

Nothing was done about my couch.

So anyway, my kids start getting rashes and I can't figure out where they're coming from. We're all having crazy sinus problems. Eye irritation. Stuff like that. What's causing this? I couldn't figure it out. I mean, my kids are COVERED in this rash. I start thinking about how my apartment flooded and got very moldy, and go online to do some research. I find out that black mold is very harmful. Black mold can cause rashes like my kids have. And sinus problems. And eye irritation. And other fun things like CANCER.

This displeases me. I go and look up Michigan Housing Laws.

By law, my landlord should have completely replaced the carpet, ripped the wall apart and cleaned it properly, and replaced my couch. Under the law, anything porous that was wet for more than 24 hours needs to be replaced. This includes my couch, of course.

I look at my lease. It tells me that while the owner is not responsible for my property, he IS liable to replace it if it's damaged through his negligence or ommission. I'd count the second time my apartment flooded after the problem was supposedly fixed as 'negligent.'

We decide to get something done about this. My kids are sick. We're all sick. The apartment smells funny a lot of the time. The couch is ruined: rusted, molded, stained. All I want is to have my couch replaced, and the apartment taken care of properly. And some compensation for the pains I've had to go through to get this done. I don't think that's too much to ask, considering that I'm living in what the law terms a fucking BIOHAZARD.

We call Spawnie's legal advice hotline thing he gets through his work. They set us up with a phone consultation with a lawyer, just to be safe. I went and talked to the landlord before the lawyer called, to see if Mr Landlord would like to settle this in an amicable fashion.

He was patronising and condescending. He said he'd never heard of anybody ever getting sick from mold (which is odd since I've got peer reviewed medical journal articles full of things about Sick Building Syndrome and the effects of black mold on infants and small children, not to mention adults.) He says he wants to keep me happy, though, so he'll move us up to a 2 bedroom and waive the extra security deposit. He'll also give us a month off our rent.


That's 750 dollars. That's not enough to replace the couch I have, which is a very large sectional ( a NICE one before this shit happened) from Art Van, with a sofa bed in the one section. These things are running about 1600 dollars right now, for a cheap one. The one I have is a NICE one. 750 dollars is not good enough.

Or, he says, he'll let us break our lease now and move out, no hard feelings, because unless we renew the lease now for the two bedroom, he's going to sell it to someone else come time for the students to return from summer break. I smiled and said I would talk to Spawnie about it and get back to him.

Later, Spawnie speaks with the lawyer, and the lawyer tells us we're probably going to have to sue, and gives us the name of a local lawyer that can do this for us.

So.

Fun.

Hah. I don't really want to sue this guy, but considering the stuff I've been reading, there can be very long term health effects from prolonged exposure to black mold, and my kids are covered in nasty rashes from being on that couch. I can't have that anymore.

I don't think it's too much to ask to have this guy give us the new apartment and the cost of the new couch, plus a month off rent to make up for all the doctor's visits we've had to make, the skin creams, and the general mental anguish (I love that term), and on and on and on. Considering I've been reading about lawsuits against landlords for this same thing that have resulted in the plaintiffs winning like millions of dollars, I think he'd be better off just buying me the new damned couch.

So that's my interesting day. I'll keep you all posted on what happens next...


link | posted by Zombie at 8:39 PM | 0 comments


Thursday, March 18, 2004

I am mesmerized...

....by this. It's amazing. ph34r teh un1br0w.


link | posted by Zombie at 7:07 AM | 0 comments


Friday, March 05, 2004

Back By Popular Demand...

Well, so there wasn't any demand, but I haven't done this in a long long time, so here we go...

Meet harshcomputronics. He's dumb. Very dumb. Be annoyed. Very annoyed.

I know I was.

harshcomputronics: hi
harshcomputronics: wanna have romantic chats ?

zombie_hates_everything: Nope.

harshcomputronics: y

zombie_hates_everything: I have a boyfriend. Go away.

harshcomputronics: we r not going to meet each other
harshcomputronics: so y not orally
harshcomputronics: u know 1 thing
harshcomputronics: if it so happens that
harshcomputronics: ur boyfriend ditches u than wat ?
harshcomputronics: do u have any answer

zombie_hates_everything: Well, if he did, which he won't, but if he did, I certainly wouldn't be wanting anyone like you. You can't even spell. You sound like an idiot. Go away.

harshcomputronics: u r too moody
harshcomputronics: well u too is idiot
harshcomputronics: coz u have no womenhood in u
harshcomputronics: u r boobless
harshcomputronics: a girl without boobs
harshcomputronics: flat dicks

zombie_hates_everything: lol

harshcomputronics: i can come at ur place
harshcomputronics: i want to fuck u
harshcomputronics: what u will charge ?

zombie_hates_everything: I thought you just said I have no 'womenhood' in me. Why would you want to fuck a woman with no 'womenhood'?

harshcomputronics: there u r right
harshcomputronics: but i had just saw ur pic
harshcomputronics: u seems to b sexy
harshcomputronics: u r frm michigan right

zombie_hates_everything: You know, your approach to picking up women seems to be lacking a certain finesse. Perhaps you should go practice on a pair of socks and then get back to me.

harshcomputronics: dont type too big sentences

zombie_hates_everything: Sorry. u r a dum ass. do u understand?!?!

harshcomputronics: actually u have fear
harshcomputronics: that i will come n fuck u

zombie_hates_everything: Actually, that is a pretty scary idea.

harshcomputronics: but u r been proved as no.1 idiot
harshcomputronics: coz i m chatting with u far away from asia
harshcomputronics: so dont fear
harshcomputronics: ya i m frm india

zombie_hates_everything: No, I realized you're some class of foreigner. American's can't speak English properly, true, but you're a bit worse than they are.

harshcomputronics: this shows ur immaturity
harshcomputronics: lets grow up
harshcomputronics: now u r growing up

zombie_hates_everything: Yes, my bones are stretching and everything.

harshcomputronics: do u have any sex experience ?
harshcomputronics: answer in yes or no only

zombie_hates_everything: Are you some sort of sex maniac?
zombie_hates_everything: Don't dictate to me how to answer your idiotic questions.

harshcomputronics: thats none of ur business

zombie_hates_everything: Then it's none of your business whether I have experience or not.
zombie_hates_everything:

harshcomputronics: ofcourse thats part of my business
harshcomputronics: i will fuck u & give u amount
harshcomputronics: now dont say fuck me freely

zombie_hates_everything: Your business?
zombie_hates_everything: So, your business is paying women for sex?

harshcomputronics: nope
harshcomputronics: i m having here business of computers

zombie_hates_everything: Ah, I see. Programmer, right?

harshcomputronics: ya

zombie_hates_everything: So, let me ask you a question, Mr Horny Indian Programmer.

harshcomputronics: say

zombie_hates_everything: If you are in the business of computers, you should know a lot about the internet, right?

harshcomputronics: some

zombie_hates_everything: Okay, then why don't you know how to behave on the internet?

harshcomputronics: ya i do

zombie_hates_everything: Do you realize that women do not want you PMing them in broken English, offering to pay for sex?

harshcomputronics: thats true

zombie_hates_everything: Not the best way to pick up a lady. What is it with you people?

harshcomputronics: i know i have harrased u

zombie_hates_everything: Every day, I am PMed by hundreds of Indian programmers, asking for sex. What's the matter with your male population?

harshcomputronics: i think u r angry

zombie_hates_everything: I'm not angry, just curious. Answer the question, please. What's the matter with the men in your country that you all have to come online to get sex?

harshcomputronics: this particular problem is with each & every male throughout globally
harshcomputronics: Everyone likes sex

zombie_hates_everything: No, the majority of men PMing me specifically for sex are Indian.
zombie_hates_everything: Do you know that throughout the internet, the men in your country are a huge joke?

harshcomputronics: lakhs of women r too interested

zombie_hates_everything: We call you HIPs, or Horny Indian Programmers. You're all a big joke.

harshcomputronics: actually u dont really know
harshcomputronics: n numbers of women ask for sex to us
harshcomputronics: let me clear 1 thing

zombie_hates_everything: If there are so many women asking for sex from you, then why are you PMing me for it?
zombie_hates_everything: Go find one of them, eh?

harshcomputronics: i m not exactly a programmer

zombie_hates_everything: You said you were a programmer.

harshcomputronics: i m actuallly into computer hardware
harshcomputronics: computer peripherals

zombie_hates_everything: Fine. A small difference. Fact remains that you work in computers and you're Indian and you're harassing women for sex.

harshcomputronics: wats ur real name zombie

zombie_hates_everything: Fact remains, also, that you should know better than to approach women in this manner.

harshcomputronics: not harassing

zombie_hates_everything: You're not getting my real name.

harshcomputronics: making quality mood

zombie_hates_everything: I just want to know why you have to come online to offer women money for sex. Can't you find a whore where you live?

harshcomputronics: nope i dont know ur real name
harshcomputronics: 1 thing is sure
harshcomputronics: u too like sex but u r not free to chat
harshcomputronics: y so
harshcomputronics: ?

zombie_hates_everything: lol, whatever.
zombie_hates_everything: Look, go bother someone else, okay?

harshcomputronics: y
harshcomputronics: i love u
harshcomputronics: thats true
harshcomputronics: if u were near me i could marry u

zombie_hates_everything: No, I doubt that highly.

harshcomputronics: i liked ur face much much
harshcomputronics: in ur profile

zombie_hates_everything: You're not understanding what I'm saying, are you?
zombie_hates_everything: You're harassing me, you annoy me, and I want you to go away. Since there are so many women that ask you for sex, go find one of them, please.

harshcomputronics: but those no one has good looking features as u have
harshcomputronics: i m not harrasing u
harshcomputronics: u r misunderstanding me

zombie_hates_everything: Well, that's just something you'll have to deal with. I have a boyfriend, we're very much in love, and I have no desire to have sex with you. Do you understand?

harshcomputronics: i m not asking to have sex with u
harshcomputronics: i was just joking
harshcomputronics: i was testing u
harshcomputronics: thats it

zombie_hates_everything: Whatever. Just go now.

harshcomputronics: but atleast u can have sexual chats
harshcomputronics: how should i go dear
harshcomputronics: y u r ignoring me

zombie_hates_everything: I do not want to have sexual chats.
zombie_hates_everything: Stop talking to me.

harshcomputronics: g
harshcomputronics: y
harshcomputronics: y
harshcomputronics: y
harshcomputronics: ?
harshcomputronics: ?
harshcomputronics: ?
harshcomputronics: had u licked samen of ur boyfriend
harshcomputronics: just share the experience
harshcomputronics: shady is another flurt
harshcomputronics: so b alert


Ew. Shady, he says, referring to Shady Windwalker, who I was talking to in the room at the time.

Just share the experience.


link | posted by Zombie at 11:30 AM | 0 comments